Today I went to a festival in my old college town.
My father was playing a gig there with his ukulele band, which is about as metal as it gets in this family…
It has been a nice, long, lazy weekend. I have written a lot and my sister gave me a henna tattoo (it hasn’t all set properly so it doesn’t look great yet):
Really excited to see the boyfriend tomorrow.
Alice.
So, after wandering around Ikea for two and half hours to find the grand total of one spatula, two door mats and a couple of tea towels an alarm began whirring.
Everyone was told to leave the building calmly and quickly and, hey, not to worry, because the children who were running around in the play area have already been taken outside.
My sister was not amused, I thought the whole thing was absolutely hilarious…
I have managed to get a cold. I always get ill when I get a couple of days off. So I am going to make this a rather short post so I can curl up, watch Doctor Who and get a decent night’s sleep.
Alice.
I arrived home last night after the people I applied for a job with were kind enough to offer me a skype interview.
I’m all set and ready and I think I look a little bit like I’m about to announce where the emergency exits are and tell people to fasten their seatbelts until the safety light goes off,..
So I have a half hour interview about to start followed by a 20 minute aptitude test… Let’s do this!
I feel that went rather well, but it’s always hard to tell whether you’ve ticked the right boxes or not.
Will just have to wait and see!
If they send me an e-mail today then I will update this post, but if not, goodbye for now!
Alice.
I can’t tell if this morning’s bed hair is channelling John Green’s puff…
…Or Sue Perkins’ morning glory…
These two people are basically my spirit animals.
I am probably going to travel three hours to visit my parents today.
I also might have an interview here tomorrow.
The problem is this: I don’t want to go back to my old home town and then get confirmation of an interview and I don’t want to stick around here with no food if I haven’t got an interview.
Awks.
So I am going to go tidy, shower and pack as if I were definitely going home. Then I will wait as long as I can bare. Then I will get on a train whilst listening to Punk Rock songs in a sort of fuck-it-it’s-not-like-I-need-a-job-or-anything-to-survive-and-buy-food way.
That sounds like a totally reasonable, adult way to handle this whole thing, right?
Alice.
I have work tonight and then I HAVE A WEEK OFF!
I am going to spend some time at my parents’ house, some time with my sister, and some time visiting my boyfriend and I am so excited!
It’s cold here. And I’ve run out of food.
The only problem is that I applied for a job which stated interviews would be held this Friday. And I still haven’t heard anything. I don’t want to risk buying a ticket for tomorrow if it turns out I’ve got an interview on Friday, but I also don’t want to buy a ticket for Friday because if I don’t get an interview I want to go home as soon as possible.
Annoying.
I’m going to give it until tomorrow afternoon then, if I haven’t heard, I’m going to jump on a train. They can’t really give less than 24 hours, can they?
Alice.
So, after feeling absolutely miserable yesterday for no real reason and failing to get anything at all productive done I woke up today super-early and decided to have a morning focussing on myself life a selfish princess because sometimes that’s what you need to make you feel okay again.
I got a hair cut (shorter than ever, because it keeps growing too fast and I can’t afford to get it cut any more often than I already do):
I feel like a fabulous pixie.
Then I had breakfast/lunch at a little place and sat outside and, after a couple of days of feeling like I had nothing to say, I managed to write a whole chapter and am feeling very proud and content with life at the moment.
I also bought an adorable cheap little suitcase which has made the fact that I’m going to visit my parents in a couple of days feel properly real and like something I can start really looking forward to, instead of just being something in the distant future that was going to happen eventually.
EDIT: Just to really put yesterday’s black mood to rest I have received an e-mail saying I have finally got an interview for a decent job. Cross all your body parts for me!
Alice.
I’m feeling a bit down today. Not really sure why.
So have a seflie I didn’t really want to take.
Alice.
This rant is dedicated to all the creepy creepers out there.
You go guys!
(And by ‘go’ I mean away from me, at speed. Thanks.)
My shift at work last night was rather horrible. Didn’t get to sleep until almost eight o’clock this morning. Have to go and do it all again tonight.
I hate Bank Holiday weekends. Everyone uses them as an excuse to act like a drunken twat.
Also, the creepers were out in force last night and I received (for probably about the hundredth time in my life) my least favourite compliment of all:
“Wow. You’re actually really pretty without your glasses on…”
I used to take this as a compliment and say “thank you”.
Then it started making me uncomfortable so I’d say nothing and just sort of anxiously find a way to extract myself from the conversation.
Now, I have zero fucks to give, and I answer this by looking deeply into the speaker’s eyes and reply:
“I look even better without my wig on.”
And then I skip the fuck away.
My glasses mean I can SEE. You fucking idiots.
And don’t tell me I “really should get contacts”. I know they exist, I don’t live under a fucking rock.
I just don’t fancy having to poke something into my eye every day. I have loads of allergies so my eyes get sore around animals, dust, certain kinds of shampoo and fragrances, and generally anything mother nature decides would be fun to throw in my face.
They also cost a shit-load of money – the initial consultation where they check your suitability for contacts would be nearly £100. Which I don’t have, which is slightly besides the point because I don’t want them anyway.
So, I look pretty without my glasses on?
Aww, gee, thanks Mister…
How do you like me now mother fuckers?
Whilst reliving my fourteen-year-old emo days has been a blast from the past, I am getting a hair cut on Tuesday because I keep nearly falling down the stairs at work.
Incidentally, I once had a slightly more reasoned and intelligent rant about the compliment “I bet you look even better with long hair”, which you can read HERE if you are so inclined to do so.
Peace out.
Alice.
This is quite a long post but it’s one of the most important I think I’ve written…
The most recent trending charity drive is the ALS #icebucketchallenge. It’s raising money for, what is commonly called, Lou Gehrig’s Disease – a neurodegenerative disease which stops motor neurones transmitting around the body, leading to paralysis and death.
This is a great thing to raise money for, like, a really great thing. So please don’t misunderstand me – this post is about social commentary, it is not meant to bash the idea of giving money to a decent charity.
One of the problems with the ice bucket challenge (besides it not being very good for your body to tip a bucket full of ice over your head) is that going viral means it has become popular and accepted – a competitive task to raise money – but it doesn’t necessarily do the job of educating anyone about what ALS is or how their money is going to be spent. Some videos of people completing the IBC don’t even have a number you can call to donate or a link to the ALS Association’s website to give you more information about what the disease is and what their charity is doing to “create a world without ALS” (the charity’s slogan).
Now, this sort of viral fame has another side-effect: blindness to other good causes.
I’m not suggesting it’s possible to rank charities and their work according to importance, and I’m also not saying that it is one person’s responsibility to help everyone – this isn’t about blame, I’m talking about the absolutely natural effect that sudden trends have on people.
By distracting us with a long-term goal (wiping out ALS) it can make us overlook the current issues that are right in front of our ice-water-soaked face.
I want to talk about Mike Brown.
On August 9th of this year, Police Officer Darren Wilson shot an unarmed 18 year old black boy six times.
The black community in the state of Ferguson began peacefully protesting but were set upon by the police. The few images that are coming out of the state show scenes of police brutality, reporters getting maced, “rubber” bullets causing horrible wounds, people tending to one another with milk after having tear gas fired directly at them.
I say “few” images because reporters are ending up in hospital and being threatened with arrest just for doing their job and trying to report what’s actually going on.
And you know what trended?
Hashtag I Support The Officer Who.
A quarter of a million dollars has been raised by people who wish to show their support for Officer Wilson’s choice to murder a kid who, all evidence suggests, had his hands up: The Universal symbol for “don’t kill me”.
So what is there that can be done? It all looks a little hopeless at the moment but there is a very real and immediate impact that anyone with a little bit of money to spare can have.
FEED THE STUDENTS OF FERGUSON. (link opens in a new page)
Which is raising money for the ST. LOUIS AREA FOOD BANK.
A lot of the kids from poorer backgrounds in Ferguson rely on their free school meals – because the schools have been closed due to the state pretty much going into lock down, there are a whole load of parents in Ferguson who are struggling to get their kids enough food.
There’s also the MIKE BROWN MEMORIAL FUND which hopes to help with funeral and legal costs for the the family.
And the NATIONAL LAWYERS GUILD who are providing legal support in Ferguson for those being arrested for protesting.
So, if you are able to donate a little bit to help, then please do. And tip a bucket of ice over your head if you want. Like I said, this post isn’t about ranking charities or mocking anyone’s attempt to help a good cause – I just think it is important to do some research, understand what the cause your giving to aims to do with your money, and remember that there are a lot of worthy causes out there and it’s important to find one that’s close to your own heart, not just the one that’s trending on twitter right now.
Anyway, peace out for today.
(Not that they would shoot me. I’m white.)
Alice.
Edits: A few links have been added after the initial post as I’m still carrying out research on what’s going on in Ferguson and how people can help.
I also realise an early version of this post has ‘ASL’ instead of ‘ALS’ because my touch typing is apparently not as good as I keep telling prospective-employers it is…
Today I destroyed my feet trying to break in the new shoes I bought because I now have a hole in EVERY pair of shoes I own.
I will defeat these bloody things. My feet are not too wide. THEY WILL FIT.
Cinderella’s got shit to do.
Today I have also…
Ultimately, none of this matters, because in JUST SIX DAYS I WILL BE TRAVELLING HOME TO SEE MY PARENTS AND MY SISTER AND MY BOYFRIEND AND HIS FAMILY AND WILL HAVE A WHOLE WEEK OFF FROM WORK AND WILL NOT HAVE TO CONSTANTLY CHECK MY ELECTRIC METER OUT OF FEAR THAT MY MINIMAL USE OF LIGHTS AND OCCASIONAL SHOWERING IS GOING TO LEAVE ME BANKRUPT WHEN MY MONTHLY BILL ARRIVES.
YAY!!!!
Also, fun fact: This post was originally called “Shoes and ships and ceiling wax” until I googled it and found out that I have been getting it wrong for my entire life. It suddenly makes a lot more sense – both as an alliteration and as an actual product.
Who the fuck has time to wax their ceilings?
Alice.
*this post may not actually contain everything promised by the title.
The Selfie Revolution 