I am a newly-graduated, twenty-two year old woman and I have been living on my own, for the first time in my life, for the past five weeks or so and here are a few of the things I have learnt…
1. Having to lock my front door every time I leave is a good thing.
Previously, living with housemates and, before that, parents, I occasionally (more regularly than I should have) treated my keys as an optional item. This mostly didn’t matter because there was almost always someone to let me in. Now that I live in an apartment by myself one of my biggest fears is locking myself out; luckily the door to my flat doesn’t lock when it closes, I have to actually lock it. This means I cannot forget my keys and therefore cannot lock myself out of the building… hopefully.
2. Having to lock my front door every time I leave is a bad thing.
Because I am used to doors that lock themselves when you close them, I keep going to work and forgetting to lock my front door. Sometimes I remember that I have forgotten this halfway through my shift and I spend the remaining five hours at work panicking that I will get home to find a group of murderers and thieves sat around playing poker and waiting to chop me into tiny pieces and steal my stuff.
3. I am still scared of the dark.
It’s a childish fear, and I didn’t notice it so much last year because there were always people around in the house and always a light on somewhere, but now that I live alone I have felt the weird something-is-under-my-bed anxiety that is usually reserved for the under sevens.
My fairy lights arrived today. They will protect me.
4. Naked all the time.
Living in a teeny, tiny studio place has it’s advantages – the kettle and the shower are each only a two second walk from the bed, which means I can roll out of bed, switch the kettle on, jump in the shower while it boils, make coffee and get back into bed to check my e-mails (or scroll mindlessly through tumblr) without having to bother with the choices, wedgies or conformity that come with the need to put on clothes.
5. I own stupid things.
I own things I don’t need, but that I don’t want to get rid of because I keep telling myself that one day they might be useful…
6. I want my mummy.
I don’t miss living with my parents, exactly, I know I’m too in love with having my own freedom to come and go as I like (and be naked whenever I want) to go back to living at home, but I do miss my parents. I miss being able to leave their lights on even after I’ve left a room because I was a carefree little shit as a child, and I miss eating all of the delicious things in their well-stocked fridge without giving a damn how much they were spending each week on food and I miss coming home drunk and having them laugh at me when I tried and failed to make a cheese toastie.
Basically, I’ve realised that I was a twat and should probably phone my parents to apologise…
7. I’m actually becoming an adult.
I am doing the washing up, keeping things clean and tidy, ordering food shops full of delicious healthy things and going to bed when I feel tired instead of staying up to watch “just one more episode”. Partly this is out of necessity, and partly it’s because I have no housemates to stay up late with, and partly it’s just because I want to make a really good go at this ‘adult life’ thing people keep harping on about…
Seriously, check out that clean kitchen.
8. It’s not at all like I imagined when I was young.
I thought I’d have a big place, probably next door to my best friend in the world, and I’d have a pool table, and walk-in wardrobe hidden behind a book case, and a robot butler.
It’s not like that.
9. Having a budget doesn’t mean you have to have a crappy place to live.
If you’re smart with money, work out where the best money-saving deals are, and are just a bit lucky, you can actually get a nice apartment and furnish it as a graduate before getting a proper graduate job. It’s hard, but it’s not impossible.
10. I am incredibly lucky.
With the above point in mind, I also know I am incredibly lucky and I have to remember my privilege. I have a job, I have parents who offer me support and help and I have a credit rating and a lifestyle that means I’m unlikely to be turned away by estate agents.
If I had a kid, or had been arrested one time for smoking pot, or had a dog that I loved and couldn’t think about getting rid of, or had parents who weren’t willing or able to act as guarantors then I would be in a very different position. The forms I have had to fill out and the number of credit/background checks I have had to undergo – not just from the estate agent, the power companies, broadband companies, and mobile phone companies all run them – have opened my eyes up to just how difficult it must be for some people to afford/find comfortable, safe living environments.
Thinking about this makes me feel guilty, but also grateful and I am going to try very hard not to bitch and moan about my lack of graduate employment or money troubles in future blog posts because, whilst it’s not always nice to know it, a lot of people have got it a lot worse than me.
Alice.
The Selfie Revolution 